Understanding Attachment Wounds in Adult Relationships
Why Do My Relationships Feel So Hard to Navigate?
Do you worry that the people you care about will leave you? Do you feel guarded even when someone seems kind or trustworthy? You might want connection but then pull away, unsure why relationships feel so uncertain or overwhelming.
These feelings often come from early life experiences. How we learn to connect or protect ourselves can shape our adult relationships with partners, friends, and coworkers. You're not alone if you ever feel stuck in a cycle of chasing closeness, fearing rejection, or shutting down during vulnerable moments.
It's common to blame yourself or wonder what's wrong when you want to feel safe and connected. However, attachment wounds are more common than you might think and are not a sign of weakness or failure. Together, we will explore these patterns, understand where they come from, and build more secure, stable, and fulfilling relationships.
Why Attachment Wounds Show Up in Adult Relationships
Our earliest relationships shape how we learn to trust, express emotions, and feel safe in connection with others. If you grew up in an environment where your emotional needs weren’t met—whether through neglect, inconsistency, or hurtful experiences—you may have developed ways to protect yourself that no longer serve you. These patterns might include:
Constantly seeking reassurance but never feeling truly secure
Avoiding closeness or shutting down to protect yourself from rejection
Feeling unworthy of love or connection
Struggling with fear of abandonment, even in stable relationships
Feeling emotionally numb or disconnected from your own needs
Understanding Your Attachment Style
Attachment styles develop in childhood but continue to influence relationships well into adulthood. Identifying your attachment style can help you understand why certain patterns keep repeating and how to start changing them. Common attachment styles include:
Anxious Attachment – Fear of abandonment, craving closeness but feeling insecure
Avoidant Attachment – Guarded, emotionally distant, struggling to rely on others
Disorganized Attachment – A mix of both anxious and avoidant patterns, often tied to past trauma
Secure Attachment – The ability to trust, express needs, and feel stable in relationships (which can be developed through therapy!)
How Therapy Can Help You Build Healthier Relationships
Healing attachment wounds is not about changing who you are; it’s about learning to feel safer in relationships, trusting yourself, and creating secure and fulfilling connections. Through attachment-focused therapy, we will work together to:
- Identify and shift patterns that keep you stuck
- Heal past wounds so they no longer define your current relationships
- Build self-trust and confidence in expressing your needs
- Develop healthier boundaries that encourage deeper and more fulfilling connections
- Learn how to feel safe in love, friendship, and connection
You Don’t Have to Keep Carrying This Alone
Taking the first step toward healing can feel overwhelming, uncertain, or even scary—but you don’t have to do it alone. Support is here when you're ready.
Scheduling a free phone consultation is a great way to see if we’re the right fit.
Email me at siobhan@siobhanstrickhart.com or call/text (908) 524-1878 to take the first step.
You deserve support, and I’m here to help.